A Journey to Stillness, Part 2
So, here I am several days later and still not able to just be still. I ended up deciding to buy another car, because the cost of repairs would be more than my old friend was even worth at this point. With that decision came many details that must be taken care of. So, I am 5 days into my time off and watching myself feel frustrated by the interruption of what I had planned, dealing with stuff that I have little control over during the week of New Years, when things are closed and I am in a place where I know no one and don’t know the area.
I got through those days of uncertainty, where everything was not in my control, by finding the beauty in my surroundings. Enjoying the warmth, feeling the sun on my body. I have meditated each morning, done Yoga, taken long walks, explored the countryside around me. Coming back each day to this peaceful, beautiful place I am staying in. I find myself filled with such gratitude for all I experienced. Each new experience has brought me more in touch with myself and how I come to life. I came here with the expectation of entering a month of silence, instead, this first week has been dealing with life. So, I haven’t been able to maintain silence in the outside world, but have been settling each day into a new level of silence and stillness within. Paying attention to how I feel, how I react to the events that have taken place. Noticing what brings anxiety, fear and how I can bring calm and stillness into my life. Reminding myself to fall back on the sense of trust that has so often been what has sourced me in this life.